I’m going to get into things that we think will make us happy but turn out not to most of the time for most of us. We have all done something we “in our heart of hearts” thought would somehow enhance our happiness only to reach the destination to find our levels of happiness are not reaching new heights, or even shifting for the better slightly.
So I’ll share with you a non exhaustive list possible situations and things which may appear to “make you happier” but are hollow.
Fame It’s one of those things that looks great when you don’t have it. To some degree it even looks good when you do have it, but the façade wears off after then honeymoon period. Look at the countless celebrities who said fame isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, this usually happens mid to late career when it all sinks in.
Wealth This one has an air of subjectivity to it. Money is great from the perspective of living comfortable and being able to do what you enjoy (within reasonable limits),but does extreme wealth buy happiness? I’d suggest probably not. The more you have, the more there is to lose. Not to mention the vast amount of people will never achieve extreme wealth.
Popularity So its great to have a good number of friends but being extremely popular might not enhance happiness beyond having a steady (average number) of friends. You’re social calendar might be back to back for the whole week with even yet more people wanting to catch up. I could imagine that to get overwhelming.
Buying stuff and materialism This has a few ways in which it can be a black hole for ones total happiness.
The newness or “currency ” will fade over time. Keeping up with the Joneses will only last so long, there will be a new pair of trainers out next month. Have you got them?
You once again have more to lose. While physical possessions are nice you could lose them at any time, not to mention you are merely a temporary custodian while you are here on planet earth.
The “rush” to acquire more is always there. In most cases the rush and excitement before buying something actually is more exciting than when you actually have one, this can lead to more buying. In time this can become a merry-go-round.
Women’s magazines While I think paying attention to your appearance and making the effort to display your best self is a positive self affirming thing for women I do think the fashion mags can detract from our happiness by putting out lots of false images that we should aspire to. Many of these images are unobtainable due to the fact that they are using models and many of the photos used are photoshopped or “doctored” in some way. These images can give out unrealistic expectations.
Accomplishing While accomplishing is indeed a positive thing in moderation, over accomplishing can tire, stress, and tax the mind and physique. While a successful project can aid happiness productivity itself can limit happiness if you go overboard.
Productivity aimed in the wrong direction can also limit potential happiness as all the work is being put in with minimal results so its wise to check in with yourself to see if everything is still relevant.
La Reina Razonable